Magically Delicious

“You are the marshmallows in my Lucky Charms of life.”

Lucky Charms is by far my FAVORITE cereal. Hey…they are “magically delicious” after all! Just about every human in America has had this cereal, and for many of us it was a staple of our childhood breakfast routine. I want you to imagine for a minute…eating a big bowl of that wonderful sweet treat. Now…take away the marshmallows!!! Could you imagine Lucky Charms cereal without that sweet, mushy goodness? It would NOT be the same. It would just be bland, and tasteless, and I can guarantee that you would not find one kid on this planet who would voluntarily eat that cereal if it only had the brown crunchy things.

Is this how you feel about your relationship right now. Are you at a place where if you took you spouse out of your world, your life would lose its sweetness, and you would be left with a bunch of stuff that you have no use for? Sure…you would be able to survive…but it just wouldn’t be near as fun, and it wouldn’t’ be nearly as flavorful.  

I want you to take a good look into your “cereal of life.” Is it filled with colorful and flavorful things? And is it also balanced out with some healthy bites as well. If you look into you bowl and all you see are tasteless flakes, and boring colors you may need to look around for some flavor. HANG ON NOW!!! I don’t mean for a “NEW BOX OF CEREAL!” Life is filled with lots of ingredients. All of which you can find in your pantry at HOME. You just need to look for it, and maybe have your spouse help you get it if it is somewhere out of your reach.  You don’t need to go shopping, and buy a whole new box of cereal…just find some sweet fruit, or add some sugar!

Follow the light

"You light up my life!!"

 

There is something special about being 100% confident thatyou are someone’s everything. For me, to get a note like this makes me feel ontop of the world. And an added bonus today…ARTWORK! You gotta love it.

Every now and then there are some little things make me thinkback to former relationships, and how at times I was SO WRONG about thefeelings I had for someone. I spent years in a relationship with someone whocalled me lazy, turns out I work pretty darn hard. I was told my jokes wereannoying, actually…I’m pretty hysterical if I say so myself. Among the dailyverbal beatings I took, the worst one was that I was not a good father. Well,my precious 8 year old (and anyone who knows me) would definitely dispute thatif she heard it!

Were you ever in a relationship like the one I’m describing?One that was almost completely toxic. One that even made you behave likesomeone you are not. I’ve certainly been there. And what a journey I had. Butnow looking back on that relationship, and comparing it to what I have now is areal eye opener.

Both my wife and I have been through similar situations. Andwe talk a lot about how had we met 10 years ago we would not appreciate eachother like we do now. To see the words “You light up my life” on a napkin maybe a tiny thing to most…but when you spent years in the darkness with someone…thisis the most precious thing I could have ever seen.

I want to encourage you to think about your relationships.Do they light up your life, or are you sitting in the dark all alone. Are youthe person that when you walk into a room it’s like turning the light switch ON…orare you the person who casts darkness by having a negative attitude, gossiping,not being appreciative for what you have and so on…. Either way you have theability to make or break someone’s day. Why not focus on being a bright star.

Revolving Doors

"I am so happy you're the ladderballs in my life."

There is nothing that can cause a relationship to suddenly end. Sure, someone can be caught in the act of doing something wrong that quickly ends a relationship; but more than likely, whatever they were caught doing took weeks, months and sometimes years to slowly chip away at what both individuals had worked so hard to create. I guess what I’m trying to say here is that there are certain things in a relationship, that if not carefully avoided will inevitable chisel away at the foundation of your marriage until it crumbles. I would deem one thing as THE biggest silent killer of otherwise great relationships. It’s called redundancy.

Think about the first 6 months of your relationship with your spouse. You can probably count more exciting, adventures and spontaneous things that you did in that first 6 months than you can in the past couple of years. This is not a bad thing. We all put our best foot forward when we are in a dating relationship. If it wasn’t for what happened in the beginning stage of a relationship most women would probably never settle for their husbands. AND…vice versa. The problem with this is that it isn’t easy to consistently come up with new ideas of things to do together, and for the most part it isn’t practical, especially if there are kids involved.

So back to today’s lunch note…Yesterday I found myself cleaning up outside after a big Saturday night bash my wife and I threw for neighbors and family. The back yard was pretty much trashed (mainly because me and some of the guy’s got a bit to “rowdy.” So there I was trying to breakdown a 10x10 tent, clean up a bunch of trash and beer cans…when my wife walks up with our 10 month old on her hip. Now I’m already treading lightly here because I did get a little out of hand with the guy’s last night. I was totally expecting her to rag me about staying out until 1:30am, or about the HUGE mess I had made. Instead she said “How about a break baby?” I was a little taken back, and then she really through me off when she said “How do you play ladderball?” Ladderball is this great game where you throw a rope sort of thing at this ladder, and you keep score. Me and the guy’s had played it most of the night before, and the game was left out. The next thing you know I’m putting the tent back up, and showing Heather how to play. For the next 2 hours we sat outside playing this game, taking turns with the baby in tow. We laughed, talked trash to each other and just really had the best time. And it came out of nowhere.

As I started thinking about it, it made sense that we had so much fun because we were doing something new, and we were both enjoying it. If we aren’t careful we will find ourselves in a rut. Doing the same old things day in and day out. Routine is healthy, and for the most part a routine is essential to run a household smoothly. But be careful that you don’t put yourself, and your family into a revolving door of the same things, day in and day out. Mix it up a little. Get yourself outside of your comfort zone. Otherwise, If you leave this door opened boredom will surely settle in. And who knows…you may find yourself giggling together just like you did in those first few weeks of dating so many years ago.

OH…and if your curious about ladderball there is a link below too. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ladder_toss 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ladder_toss 

I like the way you work it, No Diggitty

3/30/12

"I like the way you work it. Work it today, baby! ! :-)"

Every morning my wife and I have a little bit of time tocatch up and brief each other about the day ahead. She has known for a while that today was a big day at the office, and she knew the day would be quite stressful. When I woke up she had coffee ready, and this huge grin on her face.“It’s a BIG day BABY!” she said. Just seeing her act silly, and encourage mehelped me shoot right out of bed, and look forward to the day ahead.

Encouragement and positive reinforcement is such a bigthing, and so necessary in any relationship. Last night before we went to sleepHeather got a text from a friend that delivered some really bad news. I went tosleep worried about her being stressed out because of it. I just knew that whenI woke up this would be something we needed to work together on. However,looking back on it, I believe my wife realize that today meant high stakes forme at the office. She knows me well enough that if something is bothering her…itis going to bother me. She made a deliberate effort to make sure I saw herhappy and excited about the day, because she knew I needed to be focused and positive.

Now I’m not saying that if things are bothering you to keepit to yourself, and let it fester inside until it comes to a boiling point. Butwhat I am saying is that there are times when you can put your problem aside,for the benefit of someone else. Heather could have easily got out of bed, andhad a terrible attitude about the day because of what had upset her. And she had every right to be upset. She choseto focus on making MY DAY start right because we both had a lot riding on theday’s meetings. If I am completely honest, I would have to say I would not havebehaved this way. My day ended as well as it could have today. All meetings weresuccessful, and my entire family will benefit from that.

I have so many friends who’s wives are unable to recognizethat there are certain days a man just needs to be uplifted. To hear your wife whisper in your ear “I’m proud of you, and I’m thankful for the things you provide for our family” is a boost like no other for a man. Men need to feellike they are providers, and that their wife and children need them around(which we all know is the other way around J).

I want to encourage you if you are in a relationship (husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, coworker, etc) to be aware of what people are struggling with, and learn what their day’s hold for them. If you realize someone has a huge day ahead, put your struggles aside for the day, put on ahuge smile, and tell them with confidence “I like the way you work it, work ittoday!”

Sidenote: Now I have that Blackstreet song “I like the wayyou work it…no diggity…I gotta bag it up” in my head….click here for the song if you don’t know it…Warning…it willmake you laugh…and it will be in your head for weeks.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nnwgFAuQExE

Addicted to you...

 
"Have the kind of day that makes everyone wish they were on your drug"

Have you ever seen the movie When Harry Met Sally with Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal (I'm sure that is a dumb question)? If you have then there is no way you could have forgotten the most famous scene in the entire movie. You know the one...where Meg Ryan's character (the young and gorgeous Sally Albright) begins banging her hands on the table, faster and faster, moaning louder and LOUDER...and finally, when she "finishes," the camera pans to an older lady and she says...I'll bet you already knew it before I finished the sentence...you are correct! She say's "I'll have what she's having!" 

Clearly the older lady could see in Sally's body language and facial expressions, and that was SERIOUSLY enjoying something... and she wanted it. I believe that when you are in love, or just truly at a happy place in your life, people around you can sense that about a person. It's a beautiful thing when you see someone that you haven't seen in a while, and when you bump into them they just look...well...different! You can't put your finger on it, but there is this new spark about them that was never there before. You begin to catch up with them, and they tell you about something that has happened that has led them to a place in their life where they are the "Happiest they have ever been." 

The unfortunate part about this is that we are somewhat limited at how we can control our own feelings of sadness or regret. But the amazing part about this is that we have the ability, and FULL CONTROL, to make someone else feel like "they are on a drug." It really is empowering if you think about it. You have the ability to give someone that spark. The way you treat someone, the way you love someone can actually turn their life upside down....and in the best way imaginable. So much so that a complete stranger can take one look in someone's eyes and know they have found that perfect balance in their life. Think about that the next time you see someone gushing. Are you doing something to make someone in your life have that spark...or are you putting out their fire? Even worse...Are you doing all you can to provide the spark, and all you receive in return is a bucket of water on your flame?

Gone Fishin

3-28-12

What is it about fishing that just makes you completelyforget about the busy world around you, and focus on the people you arespending time with? After getting home from work I invited my wife to gofishing at the community lake in our neighborhood. She thought about it forabout a second, and said “Let’s do it!”

Now my wife and I have a FEIRCE rival when it comes tocatching fish. And to be completely honest, she usually out fishes me on anygiven day. So we grabbed our poles, packed a cooler and strapped our 10 monthold to my chest in the baby Bjorn. By the way we left our cell phones at home. Fortwo hours we sat and joked and caught up on the day’s events. Actually, thatwas about the only the thing we caught. Not a fish in sight. But I can tell youone thing. There is nothing like spending time outdoors with the family, andnot having a phone to distract you. It was so relaxing… standing by the lakeholding my fishing pole, my baby girl was trying to figure out how to crank thereel (which she did figure out by the way) and my wife was laughing at me andcracking jokes…The time together was nice, and that night when we went to bed Icouldn’t help but thank God I’m married to a girl with a great sense of humor, adventurousspirit and most of all someone who after a long day of chasing a baby aroundthe house would put my wants in front of hers by allowing me to go fishing whenshe could have just as easily requested to stay home and put her feet up.

My wife and I have a long running statement, and it’s “I love you more.” We are constantly trying to convince the other that we loveeach other more than the other. So if one of us does something that they should not have, orif there is a funny thing that happens and the phrase fits….We’ll say…”see…thatjust proves I love you more!” I know it sounds cheesy…and it is, but hopefullyall couples have cheesy inside joke they can turn to when the time is right.If you don’t…GET ONE! 

The Little Things...

About this blog: 

Nowadays...it seems like everyone and their bother have a blog. After looking into "blogging" I have discovered there are endless reasons for starting a blog. For me, at this time in my life, I find myself in a position of wanting to remember the little details of my life. It seems like most of my life, as I look back on it, it's stamped out with memories of major accomplishments. Things like the day I graduated from college, my wedding day (both of them), the birth of my children, job promotions, the loss of loved ones...and the list goes on. My wife, Heather is the best at taking in the little things. She always finds little ways to show me she loves me, and to make sure I know she is thinking about me. There is no other better example of this than my lunch letters. 


The name of this blog came from something that my wife started doing for me a couple of years ago. Each day, my wife packs my lunch for me to bring into the office. I rarely go out to lunch. It costs WAY to much money to eat out everyday, and I have found that during lunch, the office is much quieter, and I can get more done between 12 and 1 than I can in most of the morning. Each day I dig into my lunch pale to find a hand written note from my wife. They are always different, and they are always relevant to the things taking place in our lives. While some are more clever than others, they never disappoint. My lunch letters are definitely one of the little things that I have come to cherish. 


I have come to the point where I can no longer continue to stock pile these napkins. Imagine, one note a day for two and a half years...Every Single Day. That is nearly 700 napkins that I have in my possession now! For some reason I can't bring myself to throw them away.  


Lunch Letter 3-27-12

Maybe this will give you an idea of where I'm going with this. Some notes are sweet, some notes are sassy, and in times where we may have had a disagreement...well...you will just have to see how those go....As for my wife, she will not be aware of this blog. The reasoning for that is because I don't want anyone thinking she is in on this.